Take me out of the blue

It is so normal to feel depressed sometime, isn’t it?

Well, it was a question… might sounds like a pathetic one, but I seriously want to hear from you – it is relieving to have it confirmed that I am not the only one in this planet who has this problem. So…. Do you sometime feel blue out of nothing?

Okay, maybe I was wrong about the absence of reasons, anyway I found that they don’t really matter. Most of them are stuffs I prefer to keep for myself – so indulging them to other person in search of answers is out of question.

Anyway, I am about to confess you my little secret …about things I do when I have a mood swing, or worse yet… depression!

When I have a really bad one, I’ll change my appearance. But it was usually going unnoticed because my victim is normally covered. My hair!
It has been cut pretty short, very short and extremely short. Once I wanted to shave it clean… but I feared it won’t grow fast enough and I have to look like a monk for years. FYI, I have been with a quite long hair for years… that’s a good sign of the absence of a fatal desperado.
BTW, if you are planning to apply this measure, I’ll suggest to also use some variations like coloring and curling. It’s good to look lovely, even if you’re the only one who’s gonna enjoy it.

Another trick I love to do is to call an old friend, a meeting will be better. Do you know that people are getting wiser as they grow older? There were reasons why you were attached to a particular friend, and you can expect more when you meet this friend years later. Even if there were misunderstandings that caused the close relationship ended abruptly, reconciliation would heal the past wound – as well as your presently wounded soul.

Other than those, well when I am troubled I always call my mom… though usually we ended up talking about the last "arisan keluarga" and I chose not to spill my headache (due to my mom’s health situation)…. listening to my mom voice could ease my misery. If I seriously need to vent, then I’ll call one of my big sista. That’s what they are for

Else…. uhmmm sing aloud with karaoke, ride my bike up and down the hilly road, take a long walk and stop by a masjid – spend hours there praying, clean up the bookshelf and find something to read, else?

This morning is blue

I am griefing.

An email from an old friend arrived this morning, telling me about our highschool friend who just passed away after over one year diagnosed with cancer. Long before that, I have been told that she lives in the same town – wanted badly to meet her – a girl with beauty inside and out I adore so much. But in between my really really busy live, I never took a pause and try to figure out where she lives and what happened with her life. I had no idea she was in such a serious illness. Nonetheless it doesn’t make any difference now. It just add up my "I wish I did" list.

My deepest condolences to the family of Sri Yuliawati – alumni of SMANSA Makassar 1995.